Sometimes we say things without thinking about what the words mean to ourselves and those who are receiving them. In moments of stress, when we are tired, confused, not clear about ourselves, thoughts and words can slip easily out of our mouths and send us into a place of regret, suffering and pain, so quickly. It is impossible to truly know another's reason for action or reaction. The only one we can truly know is our self. Each of us sees the world through our own lens.

Understanding myself is the beginning of making peace in my world. Seeing how I act and react to others and what consequences I create for myself is my work always. When the heart and mind work together in expression I move through my life with balance and compassion, even when chaos is swirling around me and wanting me to revert to my old patterns.  Carefully choosing my words and really seeing the person as I speak and share ideas.

 The impeccability of the words we use is so important when the goal is understanding and growth in any relationship. Often it is helpful to take a break or pause in an exchange when things get out of hand or heated. We sometimes need space and solitude to find our balance and remember the connection with our beloved partner, parent, child  or friend.  Taking space and stepping back for a moment can help open the heart and allow the mind to slow its resistance, stubbornness, frustration, or anger.  The heart feels compassion, understanding, empathy, and much more so it softens our reactions and helps us to remember who we are and what our real desire is. We become a different person when we stand in this heart place and see the situation from a different perspective.

Very often I hear clients say, "Why do I always have to do the work and change? Why don't they do it sometimes?"  I remember feeling that way so often, until I realized the truth. I was the one who wanted my life to move from a place of peace and joy. Therefore it is always my job to make this happen, no one else can even begin to do my work for me, just as I can't do theirs. When that became clear to me, I began to create a more peaceful, joyful life even in the midst of chaos. In gratefulness I do live MY life, choosing my words carefully and taking the time to give myself and others more space to be who they truly are.
Blessings,
Bobbe